"Mesosalpinx" has always been my favorite medical word

And today I got to see it! (The mesosalpinx is part of the broad ligament between the uterus and ovary.) Oh yes, scrubbed in on a total abdominal hysterectomy today, my first surgery ever! And right now, I can't imagine ever being jaded about surgery, though everyone seems to get that way. I tried to hold good energy for our patient, a very kind woman with a seductive London accent, as her body was open to the outside world and her consciousness was... well, I don't know where one's consciousness goes during general anaesthesia. Anyway, I held retractors and cut sutures and felt totally alert even though I had barely eaten or slept.

During another procedure, I got to "run the specimen down to pathology." Mind you, the following story is told by someone who has historically hated path. But when the surgeons found bizarre tissue in our patient's uterus and needed to know if it was cancerous, I flew downstairs with a bloody blob, saw it frozen, sectioned, and stained, and then looked at it on the cool double-headed microscope with the pathologist. It was my patient's very cells! And the results really mattered! (It wasn't cancerous. Not that I could tell.)

I was surprised by many things today, but almost most by a guy who suddenly appeared in the preop hallway playing acoustic guitar and harmonica.

I was inspired to be operating with three women and a woman anaesthesiologist.

I was moved by our beautiful British patient, who was in for her eighth surgery, with a bilateral masectomy in there somewhere, in not very much time. She was brave and composed.

The first day of the rest of my life

I saw patients on my own for the first time ever! It was a great half day at the Screening and Acute Care Clinic with an amazing attending -- he packed as much teaching as he could into every moment of our four hours together. Thanks, bro!

I was surprised by how open people were with me and how mellow they were about being seen by a student.

I was inspired by my preceptor's enthusiasm for teaching, and I appreciated his kindness in the face of my cluelessness.

I was moved by the fear that an undiagnosed health problem can cause someone, and the relief they feel to get an answer. 

The three questions

Third year starts tomorrow, and I'm working hard to keep my nervousness (dread?) in check.

Each day, I aim to answer these three questions offered up by Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen, hoping they will help me feel positive and purposeful.

What inspired me today?

What surprised me today?

What moved me today?

I hope it helps my friends and family keep tabs on me even though I might be less available for a while.

Special thanks to my support system this eve.